10 More Inappropriate Titles for Children’s Books

Because its Thursday, and everyone could use a chuckle!

 

This is what happens when you don't eat your vegetables!

“Monsters, Vampires, and Boogeymen: What Lives Under Your Bed”

“We Had You to Save Our Marriage”

 “Dissecting Deangelo: Take Apart a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Piece by Piece”

“Your Success=My Love”

“Why You Look Like the Mailman”

“Grandpa Gets His Casket”

“I’ll Love You as Long as You Do What Mommy Says”

“You Were an Accident”

“We Put You to Bed Early So We Can Watch Awesome Television”

“The Little Train that Couldn’t, No Matter How Hard He Tried, Because He Sucked”

Ok, what terrible titles should be listed? And why do I enjoy these so much?

Inappropriate Book Titles for Children’s Picture Books

I watch two little girls on Mondays (and occasionally on Sundays). Today was an especially rough day, where the normally happy and delightful three year old had one melt down after another. While it was eventually remedied after I discovered that she had not been fed lunch and stuffed her full of cheese sticks, carrots, and PB&J, during the debacle, my bewildered and somewhat punch-drunk mind came up with these titles:

1.       “Pee-pee in the Potty: A Questions and Answer Book”

2.       “What’s inside my Nose? A Pictorial Exploration”

3.       “Why Mommy takes Xanax”

4.       “You’ve Always Been an Annoying Child”

5.       “500 Reasons to Throw a Temper Tantrum”

6.       “Monsters in the Closet and Sharks in the Toilet”

7.       “The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round, Round and Round, Round and Round and Everyone Just Wanted the Bus to Crash and Burn”

8.       “The Little Boy who Never Stopped Talking: A Cautionary Tale”

9.       “You’re the Reason Your Parents Are Getting Divorced”

10.   “I Like Your Sister Better”